Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. The Ginleys are scattered across the country….Jerry and I are in Houston, Erin and her gang are in Atlanta, and Sean is in Cleveland. And my brother and sisters are also scattered. My sister, Kim, commented yesterday that this might be the first Thanksgiving since Eileen was born when not one sibling will be sitting down for turkey with another one. Usually at least a few of us manage to gather for the day.
Hoping that all of you are gathered with loved ones who made their journeys safely. We’ll be with Chris and Jackie in Katy, Texas. How lucky are we to have family here!
So much to be thankful for…and I am so aware of it. Right now, I’m just so thankful for all of you who are with me every step of the way on this journey.
When Sean was little, he LOVED tunnels. There were an underpass on Riverdale Road in West Springfield that he was crazy about. From the backseat, he couldn’t see the other side and so it was DARK in there ..even if it was only for a few seconds.
When we went to the Outer Banks for vacation for the first time, Sean was probably around five or six. We told him we were going across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge and Tunnel …two tunnels, each a mile long and a long bridge in the middle. He was so excited he was beside himself. I know he was imagining this endless darkness and finally coming out the other end.
What a disappointment. The tunnel was well lit. He said it wasn’t even a real tunnel. Real tunnels are DARK.
I was thinking about that this week when I thought about the title of this blog. I called it Looking for the Light for lots of reasons. I think of light as healing. I think of light as understanding. I think of light as warmth and wholeness and goodness. I think of the inner light inside each of us. And, of course, I think of the light at the end of this cancer tunnel.
But, like our tunnels on the way to the Outer Banks, this tunnel hasn’t been dark. The light is constant and steady…in the warm wishes from friends and family, in the company of children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews, in the little things like a massage from seven year old Lana or food offerings from three year old Declan or advice on wigs from Calli. It comes from a sister and brother in law who have made us really feel as if “mi casa es su casa”. It comes from doctors and nurses and technicians and physician’s assistants who are so helpful and patient with all my questions. (even if they all do look like they are about fifteen) It comes from cards and books and a big box of bling from my Dining for Women friends. It comes from a husband who doesn’t roll his eyes or sigh or even lose his cool when the traffic is horrendous and we’re late for an appointment. Yep, the light is IN the tunnel. Lucky me. Not the six year old Sean’s kind of tunnel but it suits me just fine.
The days ahead look pretty quiet. We need to get into MD Anderson either Friday or Saturday to have the dressing changed on my PICC line And then next Thursday I have a prep appointment and blood draw, Friday is minor surgery to put in a port (easier to manage than a PICC line) and then chemo on Saturday. Then (yay) home on Sunday.