First Chemo So Far So Good





First chemo done (sort of). Bringing home a slow drip called 5FU. Come on, guys…something called FU has to be nasty. Anyway, I sat around for five hours and watched stuff traveling down the tubes and into me while Sean and Jerry watched me. We played cards. I called a few people. We laughed and talked but it certainly wasn’t exciting. It was like watching the grass grow. Next time I think I’ll send Jerry away and read a book and take a nap.

I’ve read that when you have chemo you should visualize that chemo attacting the tumor and killing all the little cancer guys sneaking around inside your innocent little (or not so little ) body. Some people see kamikazes and others see bombers or a butch of guys with machine guns. Of course a peacenik might have trouble with all those guns. What I see is the tumor as a rock and a sun hot enough to turn that rock to lava is slowly melting it and warming my whole body to kill all the extra little escapees. I’m not sure where everything goes once it melts. Haven’t gotten to that part of the visualization. I mean I don’t want it to melt and freeze then somewhere else. Maybe I should get a machine gun.

Heading over to Chris and Jackie’s tomorrow for the day (Chris is my oldest nephew–one of Eileen’s kids). Erin and her gang are arriving tonight and we’ll go over in the morning to spend the day. (You did know we were planning to come all day, right, Jackie?).

This morning I went to the Apple store that’s just down the road from Anne’s. When I come home I will know SO MUCH about how to use my new MacBook Pro. Love that MacBook Pro.

I’m reading The Goldfinch. Loved the first part but not so sure about the second part.

Off to see the Littles toting a fanny pack full of 5FU that’s slowly going into my arm via the PICC line. Just went through all my clothes looking for a shirt with loose sleeves. Found a couple that might work. We’re good. It’s all good.


17 thoughts on “First Chemo So Far So Good

  1. We need details Mary. What card game did you play? Did you leave Sean with enough $ to pay the rent/mortgage? I mean really now.
    You look great in the photos, but next time a little less scene and more face. Just saying.

    Herb and I went to synagogue this morning and when we got to the part of the service where special prayers for those that are sick are said, I made sure the rabbi included your name. You probably know that Jewish folks who live in the diaspora have what are referred to as Jewish amid the Jewish names being stated, Mary Ginley is heard loudly and clearly. Perhaps G-d will hear it equally as clearly. (Oh, my Hebrew name is Baylah Chana) My Israeli grandkids don’t have Hebrew names because they don’t live in the diaspora. Phew, too much info. Just to let you know, we’re praying for you.

    You know third graders are quite anal, so being too long in third grade, I’d like to think of those melted bad guys quickly leaving via the urethra.

    Thinking of you and wishing you only good things…like those delicious grandchildren who will soon be with you.
    Barb Passo

    • Okay, Barb, I tried not to go on and on but you made me we played Oh game…can play with as few as three or as many as you want…rule is you have to take as many tricks as you bid, no more, no fewer. And Jerry killed us both. And I tried to cheat figuring they should cut me some slack cause I had cancer and was hooked up to killer drugs but they just rolled their eyes and told me to pay attention

      And, yes, I thought about where the stuff would go after I finished the blog and came to the same conclusion you did. Then I decided instead it would continue to warm till it turned into a gas and I just breathed it out during yoga.

      And thank you for the prayers at Temple. I do believe all those prayers and positive energy and support that is coming my way is the reason why there haven’t been any ugly surprises so far.

    • Hi Mary, I think I have joined this. I am so technologically challenged. Remember, we are postponing our day until the next time you are here and have the time, and feel up to it. I think of you so often. Especially when I start whining about something. You are a power of example for me. You are probably going to ask yourself at some point, “Why am I doing this?” I can answer that for you, WE LOVE LIFE. WE ARE IN THE GAME. I want to go to my grandsons’ college graduations, I will worry about weddings later. Just know you are loved by many and especially me.

  2. Did Sean cheat at cards like Declan at Candyland? Nah, probably not.
    Mary, I sure hope all the chemo sessions are as boring and as uneventful as this. We’re all melting the rock, pulverizing the lava, even machine gunning, along with you. Thanks so much for keeping us next to you; quite a crowd you got there! Love, hugs, smiles, thoughts, determination, serenity, chuckles – all coming your way. Xoxo. Shirley

    • Ditto Barb and Shirley! Like Barb, I went to Mass- and prayed for those monster demons to rid your body of uninvited guests. God is hearing all our prayers! You have the right idea… Instead of watching and passing the time, read and take notes for the book you are writing. I am with you Mary, praying and keeping the faith all the way. God is good – He will take care of you! Be strong, my friend … Love you!

  3. Well, Mary, you’re in this battle, so a gun, or high powered bow and arrow or lance might fit. I visualized knights on horses going after those suckers. You look well and well-cared What kind of books do you like to read?
    Rest well! Wendie

  4. Hmmm I think the cancer rock heats and melts to the point of just evaporating into nothing. But it’s your chemo so you can visualize it any way you want 😉

  5. Ditto Barb and Shirley! Like Barb, I went to Mass- and prayed for those monster demons to rid your body of uninvited guests. God is hearing all our prayers! You have the right idea… Instead of watching and passing the time, read and take notes for the book you are writing. I am with you Mary, praying and keeping the faith all the way. God is good – He will take care of you! Be strong, my friend … Love you!

  6. Well, as my students have been learning about phase changes in matter, heating up the bad guys to the point that they liquefy and turn to gas makes scientific sense. However, that brings to mind only one real way to release gas – FART! Let it rip and we will all applaud.

    From one peacenik to another, keep fighting! I send an arsenal of love your way.

  7. Keep ’em laughin, Mary! Your FU comment was hilarious! As Nina says, release the “baddies” by farting…plenty of your yoga poses will take you there! Enjoy “the Littles” and the rest of your wonderful support system. Missing you but taking comfort in the fact you are in such good hands. Martha

  8. I see little packmen like things traveling through my body gobbling up the cancer cells.

  9. I think the fart images are hysterical…and we all know how therapeutic laughter is!
    After my mother had her mastectomy (in the dark ages…1987, I think) she followed the surgery with 6 months of Tamoxifen. She used to sit at her dining room table, close her eyes and visualize that she was Popeye (or Olive Oyl) and the pill was her spinach. Remember how the spinach energy coursed through Popeye’s body and made him invincible? I think she even sat there and quietly sang a few verses of, “I’m Popeye the sailor man”. (My mother’s good friend Marie knitted her a small Popeye finger puppet which she would hold as she sang!)
    I should also add that my quiet, mild-mannered mother had long been a fan of Popeye’s and that when she was young, her skinny legs were reminiscent of Olive Oyl’s! So, Mary: sing, fart, breathe and visualize yourself to good health!
    Love, Nina

  10. FU used to be an old Brooklyn term!! Just yell it at people ( and those nasty cancer cells) when you’re frustrated. It’ll help! Love to you, Mary (& many prayers), Jane

  11. I also loved the picture of you and Sean. I take it that Jerry is the man behind the camera.
    Couldn’t get you off my mind Saturday. Glad to hear your first treatment went well.

  12. Everyone has said it already…..keep up that deep breathing and that cell blasting!

  13. Every time you pee, which if you are anything like me is very often, there goes the cancer cells and oh what fun to flush!
    Glad that you have already started. That means you will be all done sooner too. Have a happy thanksgiving with all your family.

    • Hey Mary,
      Between me and Barb you’ve got the Jewish connection covered. Went to synagogue a couple of weeks ago for my father’s “Yarhzeit” (anniversary of his death) and did the same as Barb when prayers for those who are ill were said. I think I had just gotten your email.
      Great to see a pic of Sean, those little boys sure have grown up!!!
      So keep up with your downward and upward dogs, shooting down those desperadoes with lava or whatever and laughing. I think of you often and am especially mindful of sending you healing thoughts during my yoga practice.
      Namaste and Shanti, Shanti Shanti!

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